“No way! Are you crazy? We already have five kids!” |
|
|
Ian Lemin’s words to his wife were sensible and firm. The Ohio couple wasn’t exactly rolling in free time, his wife Sara had to admit. When their fifth child, Caelan, was born with arthrogryposis, Ian resigned from his position in the cardiac surgical intensive care unit to be a stay-at-home dad and take care of Caelan’s many needs. Sara, meanwhile, was still a busy OB/GYN.
So the good doctor tucked the thought away, for then, at least. Maybe someone else would come for “Conrad,” a Ukrainian toddler with the same condition, years and looks as Caelan. Maybe the next time she saw a photo of Conrad on Reece’s Rainbow, his joints wouldn’t look so negatively affected by his arthrogryposis.
But one year later, when that updated photo landed on Sara’s social media feed, she saw that nothing had changed. He still looked shockingly similar to Caelan. He still was parentless. And he still was clearly suffering.
|
|
“My heart broke for him that he had gone another year without a family, without any improvement in his joints and no access to the necessary therapies,” Sara says. So she printed Conrad’s photo and stuck it to the family refrigerator.
Between the fridge and prayer, Ian was on board with the adoption within a week. The Lemins committed to Conrad on November 2019, with their homestudy approving the family for two children.
|
|
This time, it was Ian who suggested the big leap. “I just don’t think I could live with myself knowing we could’ve helped two children if we bring home only one,” he told his wife. So besides Conrad, who became Connor, the Lemins committed to Cole, another three-year-old in Connor’s orphanage.
“Connor was shy and quiet at first. He stayed close to his caregivers and observed us playing with [Cole],” Sara remembers. “Once he realized we were there to play, he joined in and opened up to us. We were amazed at the ways he had adapted to his physical challenges and was able to move around the room and play.”
Cole, meanwhile, was full of energy and affection. That energy didn’t stop when the Lemins came home to Ohio in 2021 ― in fact, the word chaos seemed to move in alongside the boys.
|
|
“We took a lot of walks around the neighborhood, because that seemed to calm everyone down (and contain them in a wagon for 30 minutes!),” Sara says. “There were lots of doctor appointments as we got them established with the specialists they needed. There were plenty of days where we just tried to survive from one meal to the next, or from naptime to bedtime!”
But survive they did, somehow. Even when Ethan and Avery, the oldest two Lemin kids, moved away to college. Even when Ian and Sara sold their house and moved to a new neighborhood. Even when Connor had four surgeries and 19 sets of leg casts in his first year home.
To Sara’s surprise, Connor and Cole didn’t merely survive, either. The now four-and-a-half and five-year-olds seemed to fit in with their new parents and siblings like they had been there all along, broken English notwithstanding.
|
|
“It is as if they were always meant to be here, just as God had planned,” their new mother marvels.
As the months passed, Sara found more reasons to marvel: even with speech and learning delays, Connor and Cole learned a new language well enough to blossom in school and in the community. They began showing their silly and playful sides, proudly wearing shirts proclaiming, “When Life Gives You Lemins, Make a Family!” They became more independent with age-appropriate tasks and accomplishments.
|
|
“The best thing about Connor is his determination to figure out a way to do whatever he wants despite his challenges,” Sara says. “The best thing about Cole is his happy demeanor and love for everyone.”
Lemin life these days is best represented by color-coded calendar resulting in “a rainbow of chaos,” as Sara calls it. “Most days feel like there is not enough time or energy to go around, but somehow there is always enough love.”
Maybe that’s what happens when you choose to parent seven children, including “triplets” with special needs. Or maybe it’s what happens when you open up your table to sons who don’t share your DNA ― but your heart.
|
|
Maybe it’s why Sara can quickly list so many reasons why the past three years have been worth it, sensibility be darned.
“To see each of them reaching their full potential. To listen to their silly laughs and know they are happy. To see them snuggle up with their big siblings and know they are truly loved,” she says.
|
|
“God knew how the fabric of our family would be woven, and we are so blessed to call it ours!” |
|
|
|
Crystal Kupper is a freelance writer specializing in magazines and special projects. Since earning her journalism degree, she has written for clients such as Zondervan, Focus on the Family and the Salvation Army, among many others. |
|
|
REECE'S RAINBOW • www.reecesrainbow.org |
|
|
|
|
|
|
