Girl, born 2013
Congenital retinal degeneration, developmental delays
Listed: April 2017
From the agency: When the update came in, it was hard to read. But I powered through. Until I saw this:
Please describe his/her personalities in detail? No personality
No personality. No personality. I kept reading it over and over again. No personality. This cannot be so. Her referral, from two years ago, describes her as “giggles when she is touched; lovely when she smiles; enjoys that someone accompanies and plays with her.” Now, no personality.
In continuing to read the update, and comparing it to the two year old referral, it is pretty clear that Harlow has been forgotten. She does not go to school. She cannot perform any fine motor skills simply because she cannot see. She cannot perform most gross motor skills simply because she is given no chance to. She spends her days in her crib. Alone.
I am fairly certain that it should not read ‘no personality,’ but instead should read ‘no spirit,’ or ‘lost spirit,’ or ‘crushed spirit.’ It is not her personality that is lacking, but her spirit slipping away. She has been given up on by those around her, and has no other option but to give up on herself.
Harlow lives in dark, quiet solitude. No place for a child. She has lost hope. But we have not. We still see potential. We still see hope. And we will continue to share about Harlow until a family – HER family – sees it too.
The update is concluded with:
Anything else you think the family should know about this child? No
A response laden with hopelessness and doubt. A response lacking any type of love or compassion for this child. This soul whose spirit is in there somewhere, but if she stays where she is, will soon be gone forever.
has been donated towards the cost of my adoption!